My Truth About Postpartum

I honestly feel like postpartum is something no one reaaaaally talks about, just kind of brushed under the rug because we have to go through it. Blake's 13 months old, and I JUST NOW feel normal. When I say normal, I mean "new normal", because let's face it, pre-baby {everything} is a thing of the past. And I STILL have my days where I start to slip back into that dark hole.

I didn't lose the "baby weight" within the first couple months like everyone told me I would or assumed I would. I didn't just "snap back" to my old body. Beyond the cutesy baby pictures I posted on the reg, it wasn't all rainbows and butterflies.

Rewind to B's birth...

Blake was 9 lbs 12 ounces, 21 inches, and I had a regular (with epidural) birth. I had a scheduled induction (due to B's growth estimates) a week early. During labor, I pushed for about 3.5 hours. Like.. the forceps were used during delivery because her big ol' head/shoulders - but, came out of it with only a 2nd degree and the smallest cut because my doctor is the GOAT, and everything healed up just great. BLESSINGS.

But, NO ONE prepared me for my immediate postpartum recovery. No one reaaaaally told me about the dermoplast spray, the ice packs, the laxatives, the cooling pads for your tatas,....

The first few days I put on makeup just to try to feel as alive as I could, but I could barely walk, milk supply was coming in (got mastitis, OUCH), sleep deprived on a level I had never experienced before, and I checked to make sure B was breathing probably 898239282 times (anxiety at its' highest). WORLD OF EMOTIONS. I cried in the shower every night for a solid 2 weeks. I was sore everywhere, tired as heck, my body looked SO different, and I was a hormonal mess.

After the first week (maybe days), no makeup was applied, got mastitis for the second time several weeks later, I was good to even get out of pjs most days - I felt like I was falling in a deep, dark hole. Time of day had no meaning anymore.

On the flip side, I had this little human I just brought into the world, who was the absolute cutest, chunkiest thing I had ever seen, and was the exact thing that kept me going each day. [Hormones are so weird]

Postpartum + Blake have taught me to be more patient. It's taught me to shift my focus to more important things. It's taught me to find balance in everything I do, and to prioritize others' needs before my own. Throughout all these learnings, I can't emphasize the word balance enough. That's my reason for creating "Wellness for Women" - a Facebook group for women to share their areas of focus in all dimensions of their wellness, being spiritually, emotionally, physically, etc. Everyone's journey looks different, so having this outlet to express goals, achievements, failures, and struggles - it's empowering! I think it's so important to shift our mindset away from mainstream negativity and to look towards positive, uplifting experiences and people.

My personal example->

I know my body isn't what it used to be....

It's actually better. How in the world is that even possible? I am nowhere near as strong as I used to be. My workouts are nowhere near the the intensity they used to be. Hello? - Where did my abs go? And, my lower back (from the epidural) is still jacked up.

GIVE. YOURSELF. SOME. GRACE. *I'm clapping at you when I say this*

It's better because this body went through 9+ months of pregnancy (a hard one at that), delivered an almost 10 lb baby, somehow managed to workout whenever I could find a 30 minute window between feedings and feeding myself (forget shower), and managed to stay afloat with a rollercoaster diet most of my postpartum journey. And now, it can keep up with my 13 month old like nobody's business. This body has been through the ringer in such a short time, but it's made me stronger in sooo many other ways, and I can only hope this post gives other women the extra push to find their own balance!

Do what works best for YOU!

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xx

Courtney